Friday, April 22, 2011


screw good friday.
what on earth am i doing here.
life is stupid ugly.
all that heartbreaking everydayness. why should i care.
 the meanies in this world are big. arrogant. indifferent. 
why go out and get myself killed for loving.
i think that's what happened, actually.
for shit shure he didn't die for people's sins
because Love doesnt do that.
we imperfect ones are who do that.
we kill.
we maim.
we pollute whole oceans and defile the good earth.
we are the only ones capable of being not-God.
God please.
dont make me love people who don't love me.
let me just be skinny and beautiful and perfect
so i don't have to be fat and dumb inside.
so i can love me.
so jesus can still be alive and laughing in this world
without me killing him every time i forget 
that he is in all those other people
and in me,
that i am made of the very Love 
that i long for.
i can't bear that.
i can't bear that.
Love and Mercy
please be known to me
in the breaking of everyday bread.


No comments: